Denmark

Denmark is one of the most fascinating countries of Europe. For one thing, it is always changing size. During the 1920's it got so small that nobody could find it, and it turned out that a schoolboy had found it, put it in his pocket, and had been taunting his pet lizard with it. Another time, in 1947, Denmark became so big that for a few seconds everyone from Greenland to The United Arab Emirates were actually Danish.

Danish girls are very good at jousting, and Danish boys are particularly expert at identifying obscure vegetables. The Danish word for 'and' is nine hundred syllables long, and the Danish word for 'lighthouse' is actually illegal.

As everyone knows, the Danes are great pornographers, and the most popular television program is Denmark's Most Explicit Home Videos. The second most popular television program has never been dubbed into English, but it seems to be called Shutup about the Marmoset

Danish Facts

• Danish men do not sweat.
• The loudest person in the world lives in Copenhagen. On still days, she can be heard in Iceland!
• Although polygamy is not actually legal in Denmark, Danish men can have one wife, and as many bits of scrunched up paper as they want.
• The Danish national anthem is generally recognised as one of the worst pieces of music ever written.

The national sport in Denmark is looking at things.